I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
