Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
