I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
