He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
