thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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