I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize