Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
