He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
