just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
