We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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