Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
