How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
don't judge my taste in strippers
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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