when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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