I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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