god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
