tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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