What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
