That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
