How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
