Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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