Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
