Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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