people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
You were trust falling into bushes
This can only be settled by a dance off.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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