Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
