he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
