WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
