that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
