awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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