So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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