Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I love you.
Bad choice
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
