I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Let's get the cat blown out
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize
