i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
