can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
