Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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