You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
P.S. I can't hear my feet
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
