next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
