So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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