I love black thongs
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
