Grow some girl-balls and come out already
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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