god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
