so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
