big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
