Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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