I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
