Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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