She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
