I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
