What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize