: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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