toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
The struggles of a small town man whore
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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